A short story appearing in Mill Pages, Vol. 2 Issue 2

Mumma sounds angry. She is quiet yelling at my teacher. She says, “I think you need to give it more time, he’s only five-years-old.”

Mumma made a mistake. I’m not five. I’m five-and-a-half. I want to tell her I’m five-and-a-half, but my voice is stuck. Grown-ups always say I’m five, but I’m five-and-a-half.

I like my teacher, Miss Anna. She sings the good morning song. Most people just say good morning, but Miss Anna sings it. She taught us a song for the days of the week too, and one for the colors of the rainbow. The colors are red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, and violet. I know all the songs. I sing them for Mumma when we get home from school sometimes. Mumma smiles and kisses the top of my head when I sing my school songs. Sometimes she sings them with me. Yesterday we drew big lines in all the colors on the sidewalk with chalk. We hopped on the colors and we sang them.

Miss Anna and Mumma have been talking for a long time. Miss Anna tells Mumma, “I haven’t heard him say a word all year. I think it’s time to have Isaiah’s speech evaluated. Have you spoken with his pediatrician about this yet?”

I don’t know what evaluated means. I will ask Mumma later.

“But, he talks fine at home,” says Mumma. “There’s nothing wrong with his speech. There must be something going on at school. Maybe he just needs more time to adjust. He was home for over a year. Isn’t this kind of normal lately?”

“Well, then, what does he say about school when he talks to you?” Miss Anna’s arms are crossed across her tummy. One of her eyebrows is up. She looks like that when someone is in trouble. Miss Anna did that when Shane took Jacinda’s crayons, but I don’t think Mumma did something bad like Shane.

“He seems to like school. He sings all the songs you taught them in class. I know he’s paying attention. How was your daughter’s dentist appointment?”

Miss Anna’s eyes get skinny. Her arms aren’t crossed anymore. She leans toward Mumma. “How do you know my daughter had a dentist appointment?” Miss Anna asks.

I told Mumma about the dentist. I heard Miss Anna tell another teacher that her daughter has cavities and has to go to the dentist two times. I had a cavity. That’s when Mumma stopped letting me drink chocolate milk. Only white milk now. Chocolate is better, but I don’t want more cavities. I wanted to tell Miss Anna that she can’t let her daughter have chocolate milk anymore, because that’s how you stop cavities. But, it was rest time when Miss Anna was talking to the other teacher. We are supposed to be quiet at rest time. I followed the rules. I was good. Maybe Mumma will tell her about the milk.

“Isaiah heard you telling another teacher about it. He hears everything you say. He knows everything that is going on. He sings your rainbow song, can count to a hundred, and he knows the name of every kid in the class. He reads. Did you know he can already read?”

“But the problem is that I can’t assess what I can’t see. I’ve spoken to the principal about Isaiah, and she’s concerned as well. If we don’t see some progress soon, I will have to recommend Isaiah for retention.” Miss Anna isn’t leaning toward Mumma anymore.

I don’t know what retention is. I have two words to ask Mumma now. I need to remember evaluated and retention. Mumma will know. She knows all the words. She always explains the new words when I don’t know a word in a book. I want to be smart like her. I never ask about new words at school though. School is too noisy, so I ask Mumma lots of questions when we get home.

Tonight, I brought Trunk to school. Mumma said he could come to the meeting with us. Trunk is my best stuffy. He sleeps with me at night, and Mumma lets me walk to school with him. He’s not allowed to stay at school during the day. Miss Anna says no stuffies because of germs, so Mumma brings him to work with her after she drops me off. Trunk is an elephant so he has big ears and he can hear really good. I whisper to Trunk that we need to remember evaluated and retention. Mumma says an elephant never forgets, so he can help me remember.

Mumma stands up. “He doesn’t need to be retained. He’ll be bored. That’s the worst thing for him. I don’t know why he doesn’t talk here. How about you do your job and figure it out? We’re leaving.” She grabs my arm and starts pulling me toward the door. She is pulling my arm too hard. I want to tell her she is hurting me. I can see Miss Anna through the window in the door when we are in the hall. Her head is down. She looks sad. I think she needs a hug, but Mumma is walking fast and holding my arm tight, so I can’t go hug Miss Anna.

Outside Mumma gets down on her knees and zips up my coat for me. “How are you doing, baby? Are you okay?”

“Mumma, you pulled my arm.”

“I know. I’m sorry. I just really wanted to leave. Did I hurt your arm? Does it need a Mumma kiss?”

Mumma hugs me and kisses my shoulder. Her eyes are all wet like when she cuts onions. She is quiet while we walk home. I need to ask about my new words. Evaluated. Retention. I will ask later. Trunk will help me remember.

*    *    *

I get extra bubbles in my bath. Trunk doesn’t get to go in the tub. I asked for him to play in the tub with me lots of times, but Mumma says that baths are only good for regular elephants, not for stuffy elephants. So, Trunk has to sit on the edge of the sink and wait for me to take a bath. Mumma makes a beard on my face with bubbles. I pretend I’m Santa Claus and I say, “ho, ho, ho!” That makes Mumma laugh.

“Mumma, I heard new words today.”

“What words?”

“What does evaluated mean?” She stops laughing.

 “Why do you want to know?”

 “Because Miss Anna said it.”

Mumma takes a long time to answer me.

“Well, evaluated means that Miss Anna thinks the doctor should figure out why you aren’t talking at school.”

“Am I sick?”

“No, baby.”

“But the doctor is for when you’re sick. Why does Miss Anna think I need to go to the doctor if I’m not sick?”

“I think she is just wants to make sure you’re okay. Like a check-up.”

I poke at the bubbles with my fingers. I see a big one and pop it. Mumma is watching the bubbles too.

“Mumma?”

“Yes?”

“What does retention mean?’

Mumma isn’t looking at me. She is looking at the bubbles still.

“Well, it’s like a do-over. I think it means that Miss Anna is worried you’re not learning enough. But, you’re my smart little man, and I know you are learning everything you need to. You don’t need to worry about retention, because I won’t let that happen.”

“Trunk didn’t know those words either.”

 “It sounds like you and Trunk both learned new words today. Is that right Trunk?” She looks over at him and winks.

Mumma wipes the wet hair away from my face and kisses my forehead. Mumma kisses are the best. They fix things.

Me and Trunk are tired, so we go right to bed when bath time is done. After Mumma tucks us in and says goodnight, I can hear her talking on the phone with Daddy.

“I don’t know, Steve. He hasn’t said a word at school. I don’t know if it’s the school or if it’s him. Maybe we need to look into other schools.”

“Yes, I know what private school costs. Would it kill you to chip in a little more? Isaiah’s struggling. His teacher wants to retain him, but that’s not going to help. He’s smarter than most of those kids, the teacher just doesn’t see it because he doesn’t talk at school. Do you know there’s twenty-eight kids in that class? And they don’t even have a fulltime assistant. That’s not right for kindergarten. No wonder he’s overwhelmed. I don’t know about this school.”

“Fine. We’ll talk about it when you pick him up Friday.”

“What do you mean you’re not coming until Saturday? You said Friday. I told him Friday. You can’t do that to him!”

Mumma is quiet yelling again. She’s mad at Daddy like before we moved to our apartment. I miss Daddy, but I like it here. Trunk does too. It’s quiet here, except when Mrs. Fernandez vacuums upstairs, but that noise is okay.

“What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with you? He’s your kid too. He looks up to you. You can’t tell him you’re coming and then bail on him. Maybe you’re the reason he’s not talking. Ever think of that? Maybe if he had a dad he could trust he wouldn’t be such as mess.”

“Yeah, well, you better come Saturday, or don’t come at all.”

“Oh really? Screw you, Steve.”

Trunk doesn’t like it when Mumma yells. She never yells at me or Trunk. Me and Trunk are very good. We follow all the rules.

“I don’t think we get to play with Daddy this weekend,” I whisper to Trunk.

I give Trunk a big hug because I can tell he is sad and yelling scares him. He has big ears. He can hear really good.         

*    *    *

Mumma let me bring Trunk to school today. She said we can hide him in the bottom of my backpack under my extra sweater because Miss Anna probably won’t notice. Mumma says it’s an experiment. An experiment is like trying something to see if it works. Trunk is little, for an elephant, so he can fit. I told Trunk to be very quiet all day. That will be easy for him, because he is good at listening, but not good at talking.

Miss Anna wrote “Career Day” on the big board. I can read it all by myself. I guess career is like a job that grown-ups do, because some kids’ parents came to tell us about their jobs. When the grown-ups leave, we sit on the rainbow rug and Miss Anna asks us what we want to be. I think hard about what I want to be, so I am ready when it is my turn.

“Isaiah, what do you want to be when you grow up?”

Everyone looks at me. I open my mouth but nothing comes out. I want to share. Trunk is listening. Miss Anna takes a big belly breath and calls on someone else. No one is paying attention to me anymore. A lot of the kids start talking. It’s too loud, but I get my voice to make a whisper. I know Trunk will hear me with his big ears, even though he’s in my backpack in the cubbies.

“I want to be an elephant.”

Miss Anna doesn’t hear me, but Emma does. She is sitting next to me. I like her, she never yells or screams. Sometimes we play at recess. She whispers to me.

“I like elephants, but I think it would be more fun to be a bird. Why do you want to be an elephant?”

“Elephants have big ears. They get to hear everything, and they remember everything, but no one cares that they don’t talk.”

Miss Anna calls on Miles. He wants to be a fire fighter like his dad. Molly makes a sound like a firetruck siren, and Miss Anna makes a loud shhhhhhhhh. It’s too loud. I cover my ears until Molly stops.

Emma raises her hand. Miss Anna calls on her.

“Emma?”

“I want to be a bird.”

“Okay, Emma. But what kind of job do you want to have when you’re all grown up?

“I don’t want a job, I just want to be a bird.”

“Why do you want to be a bird?”

“Because then I could sing instead of talk, and I could fly up high over everyone.”

Emma looks at me and smiles, and I smile back.

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